Torquay is a place very much ‘of it’s time’, like racism or Pop Idol. Once a thriving seaside destination it now has an air of benign neglect, with the average age of it’s inhabitants somewhere in the eighties. I took a bus to town the other day and the combined age of everyone on it was 384, and there were only three of us, including the driver.

All of this contrived piffle is making a point that the charity shops down ‘my way’ tend to be very good indeed, with authentic vintage items selling for just shy of a fiver and many glorious little treasures to be picked up.

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ZOINKS! I know, right Scooby? Three cuddly, lurid, migraine inducingly patterned Christmas jumpers all in potentially lethal flammable man-made fabrics. Warm as toast and cool as hell.

L-R Animals in Distress, £2.50, Oxfam £4.00, Animals in Distress 75p.

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YOWSER! Cute dinky Victoriana booties which can only be worn with skinny jeans as with dresses they make me look as though I have trotters. £4!

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PING! I love the cover of this book, which looks as though it has been unearthed along with the Ark of the Covenant. 30p.

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HUBBAHUBBA! Don’t say a word. Look away, you’ve gazed upon it’s beauty enough. Worn leather satchel which is the BOMB. £More than I care to mention but is a Christmas gift to myself to make up for the SHIT YEAR.

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