Sorry about the rubbishness of this post. I have a headache which feels as though someone is carving their way into my skull with a spoon. Like a tiny cerebral Shawshank Redemption. Get out of my head Tim Robbins. And take Morgan Bloody Freeman with you.
However. You see this ? (Holds up fingers an inch apart) This is how close I came to achieving near perfect levels of charity shop awesome yesterday (Now you’re nodding and thinking “Yeah, that’s a really small gap, well done Daisy Pearce.”)
First of all, these. Real leather Italian riding boots for under a fiver. I nearly had a shoegasm right there in the shop. Yeah, that’s right. A SHOEGASM.
I’ve recently found a place which sells junk like this for donations only – you just stick what you can afford into the pot. Before I was working I lent so heavily on this place that now the whole building tilts at a forty five degree angle. Still, I banged this rad borderline creepy children’s book;
This pair of cool plates;
And this extraordinarily dull book with the most brilliant cover I have seen in a while.
All for under two pounds.
More shoes. Black Converse for a fiver. I laughed IN THE FACE of the elderly woman in the charity shop in which I bought these and then licked her hand as she passed them to me in a bag. She had the last laugh though because her boyfriend is a twenty one year old sex machine with a solid gold cock and I live alone in a house with no sofa.
Still, shoes right?
Beans for free means Beans for me! (Advertising agencies, I’ve totally copyrighted that.) Someone was giving away a bag of bean seeds which had a little smiley face drawn on it in marker pen. At least I think they were beans. And I think they were giving them away. This is what we’re growing anyway. I’ll let you know what bizarre, cursed fruit it bears.
Ho boy. Lastly these badass Santa Cruz (remember them, kids?) ONE POUND bright yellow shades which make me look like I’m channeling Timmy Mallet but also make me look hot as which is confusing for most right thinking people because the conflict is terrifying.